On the surface someone can appear to have it all. Behind the scenes they can be struggling just like ourselves or may even be in a harder fight than we can imagine.
Our Mom had a favorite expression which went something like this, “Stop your complaining, it could be worse!.” Her equivalent to, “People are starving all over the world, so eat what is on your plate.” One day, after I had given her advice back to her like grown children are known to do, she said, “You know Marti, it can also be better!” I said, “Of course, otherwise why would we try so hard to succeed.” Secretly she liked that response because it meant that she had been successful in her parenting; on the outside however, she gave me the finger.
But the fact still remains that some people, no matter how hard they work to change their lives, seem to be bound to the fact that they will have to work harder for their goals than the next person, or so it would seem. “Those things that don’t kill us will only make us stronger”, another favorite Mother saying along with, “God doesn’t give us more than we can handle!” But sometimes it would appear that we have reached the limit of our ability to rebound. Never!
Will and determination are awesome personal powers and if we remain focused we can surmount the most difficult issues. We learned this as Fiery Fairy Princesses and later practiced as all knowing Druid Queens. We are down in the dirt scrappers not to be beaten, as were our parents before us and their parents and so on.
Out the outside our family appeared not to have any difficulties. Sure it was obvious that we did not have a lot of money, it was also observed that we knew how to work for what we wanted and accomplished our goals. We were taught, “Never to air our dirty laundry in public.” another favorite teaching from our Mother. What went on in our house stayed in our house way before the expression, “What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas.”
Our oldest New York Goddess, the Fairy Princess/Druid Queen herself, made her transition with the Grace of God on April 17th of this year. She had succumbed to metastasized breast cancer after at least 10 years of the disease and a final heart wrenching battle for the last 18 months. It was only in these last months that we, her closest blood sisters, learned that she had many life battles that we never really knew about. That was her way, to keep those things most unpleasant to herself.
Were these problems any worse than those of others? Probably not, but wouldn’t it have eased her burden a little to have shared with family or a very close friend? I believe we all do the best we can with what we have at any given day in our lives. Sure, there were things she could have done differently or even better; but each day I know that she did what she could do with the powers that she had.
Does this determination transcend death? I know that it flows through our blood to our children and their children; but what about through the veil between the living and those that have passed on.
My neighbor gave me a hearty Hollyhock plant to put in my flower garden in memory of Noreen. She knew that Noreen and I both love wild flowers as does our sister Debbie. There were no flowers yet but a strong sturdy stem and lots of luxurious leaves. And so “Noreen” was planted close to the house and in full view of my kitchen window. There to remain year after year as a reminder of a strong woman and of the thoughtfulness of my neighbor. Two days later I was raving mad as I thought that “Noreen” had fallen victim to a careless weed whacking. “Even as a commemorative plant, can she not catch a break?!?!” And by the way, Hubs never owned up to the whacking…………….
A week later and “Noreen” has once again sprouted leaves, close to the ground but healthy! Hurrah! She lives!
One week after that “Noreen” has flowers! A true testament to those powers of Will, Determination and Survival above all else.
Oh no, it was not a whacking after all………….the leaves and the flowers are now gone again with remnants of bunny bite marks…….
Anyone want to lay odds on whether “Noreen” will rise again? My money is on the Hollyhock!
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